As we know, our addictions cause us a great deal of emotional pain – the feelings of defeat and disappointment we feel every time we relapse, the fear we’ll never be able to recover, how lonely and isolating our addictions can be. In addition to the depression, anxiety and other mental health issues we have to contend with, we also tend to experience a lot of inner turmoil. What causes this turmoil for us as addicts? What factors are contributing to our lack of inner peace and stability?
The Push and Pull
For many of us struggling with addiction, we can find ourselves in the uniquely difficult place of being negatively impacted both by our addictive patterns and by the complacency that keeps us from striving to get better. We can feel an overwhelming sense of push and pull. We’re being pushed to recover, by the concern and pressure of loved ones, by how worried they are for our well-being, by how much we don’t want to keep letting them down. Many of us find our loved ones to be the sources of some of our greatest motivation to recover, and we feel their love, and sometimes their consternation, pushing us to get better. We’re also feeling pushed by our own internal desires for wellness, the faith we still have in ourselves that we can recover, and even when that faith is dwindling, it’s still present within us, and we can still feel it pushing us forward.
Internal Conflict
At the same time, though, we’re also being pulled to take the easier, more comfortable route of staying stuck in what’s familiar, the comfort zone of our current lifestyles and addictive patterns. We might know logically that we have to get better, but a huge part of us doesn’t want to or doesn’t feel ready to yet. Sometimes it’s our fear that we won’t be able to recover that keeps us feeling so much inner turmoil around our addictions and recovery. We feel conflicted. Should we take the steps to get better if we’re only going to want to drink or use again down the line? Should we do all the hard work to quit if we’re only going to relapse again? Because of this constant push and pull, we feel at odds within ourselves. We feel a great deal of instability and inner turmoil. We never feel at peace within ourselves. For many of us, this internal environment of turmoil and instability brings about depression, anxiety and other mental health issues, that compound our unwellness and feed our addictive patterns, making us want to escape that turmoil with our drugs of choice.
At The Guest House Ocala, you will be treated with dignity, respect, and compassion. Call 855-483-7800 today for more information on our treatment programs. theguesthouseocala.com 3230 Northeast 55th Avenue Silver Springs, FL 34488