We’ve all heard the saying, “Patience is a virtue.” It’s been said so many times that it’s considered a cliché. It’s actually true, however. There’s a sense of strength in patience, in the ability to slow down. This is especially true during recovery. Recovery can be a long and winding road, and you can’t rush it. Recovery from trauma, especially, can take long because if the trauma was chronic, it’s going to take some time to recover. What happened over months or years cannot be fixed in weeks. You must commit to patience.
Slow It Down
It’s difficult to step back and let things happen when we want to control the situation to make it perfect. Patience is letting go of control, however. It’s being comfortable with whatever comes and whenever it comes. Of course, there are times when you shouldn’t slow down. If you’ve set a goal for yourself and you’re about to reach that goal, it’s not time to take it easy and slack off. Knowing when to slow it down is an important skill to have. “The most patient people are those who embrace the enjoyment of the full experience, knowing that calmly moving past the setbacks will lead you to a greater sense of appreciation in the end,” says Harriet Griffey, writer for Wellness Journal. Doesn’t that sound lovely?
About Your Attitude
Your attitude must be a positive one if you want to succeed with practicing patience. You might be used to getting things done and receiving things quickly, almost instantly. This is often the case with work-life in today’s world. Almost everyone is accessible at any time, so we may often expect them to return our calls or emails instantly. This, however, is the opposite of a patient attitude. Patience isn’t just waiting; it’s how you wait. Do you sulk and moan when you must wait longer than normal for something? Or, do you take advantage of the time you must wait and create something out of that time? Keeping a “joyful and curious disposition instead of harboring frustration” in moments of patience is key. Look on the bright side of things. Change your attitude and you’ll change your life.
How Patient Are You?
Some of us are better at patience than others. Of course, it takes time and effort to cultivate a life of patience. So, if you haven’t practiced it, don’t expect yourself to be a pro already. Think about how you would answer the following questions that Griffey poses:
- Do you regularly warm up before and cool down after your workout?
- What would you do if you’re waiting in line to pay for your shopping but the line hasn’t moved for minutes?
- Which lane of the highway do you usually drive in?
- How would you react if your computer was moving awfully slow?
- If you leave the house and a neighbor stops you to converse, how would you react?
- What kind of hobbies do you enjoy?
Is Patience Passive?
No! Deciding to be patient is an active choice you must choose each and every day. It’s not reacting negatively if something takes more time than expected. It’s not being frustrated when things don’t go your way. It is having self-regulation. It is about thinking long-term. Who do you want to be in a year? Two years? Five years? It takes time to cultivate that person, which requires patience. It’s knowing how to be patient when you are feeling physical, mental, and emotional frustration. It’s about letting go of the frustration that may build and accepting the present. It’s realizing that if something is out of your control, your anger will not influence the situation. It will only make things worse. “You can’t change whatever it is that’s thrown you off course,” says Griffey. “But you can change how you react to it.”
Tips for Patience
Griffey offers a few tips to help you practice being patient. First, she says, you should respond to your life’s ups and downs. You can choose patience, or you can choose not to be patient. But, that choice is yours. Start small and choose to bring positive energy to the situation. Accept what you cannot change and accept that things take time. Notice how you feel during this time.
Next, think about your long-term goals. Recovery is a long-term thing, so it’s important to get used to using patience in difficult moments. Try to let go of reaching for the end zone, says Griffey. Results don’t happen immediately, especially in recovery. Instead of hoping for the big results all at once, celebrate the small milestones you’ve passed.
Lastly, you’re going to have times where you are impatient. Remember that you can’t be perfect all of the time. When you are feeling impatient, ground yourself, and use mindfulness. Release the tension you are feeling in your muscles. Practice being in the present moment and be aware of what’s happening in you and around you.
The Guest House is here to help you practice patience in your recovery. Call us today at 855-483-7800. We can’t wait to help you work on your recovery today. We have programs that will benefit you and you won’t be disappointed. Call our trained and experienced staff today. We can’t wait to speak with you.